Mrs. Ludwig

EndIess Mike: But if it was biology Mrs. Ludwig would always let me slip by
EndIess Mike: She's gone now but she was awesome
EndIess Mike: I've seen her nipples sir
EndIess Mike: She was the coolest teacher ever though. But she moved.... sniff
NAW Chris: i used to always be late getting back to lunch last year but my teacher would let me slide cause i'd beat her to class half the time
EndIess Mike: Ha
NAW Chris: how did you see her nipples?
NAW Chris: and how can i see them
 

Distributing Alcohol

NAW Chris: distributing to miners is ok
NAW Chris: but not minors
NAW Chris: remember that
ocnwo hbk of dx: Haha
NAW Chris: i learned it the hard way
 

Dennis' School Mascot

ocnwo hbk of dx: I'm going to be the new school mascot, sir
NAW Chris: your school mascot's a weird gay guy?
ocnwo hbk of dx: He's a pilot
NAW Chris: a gay pilot?
 

Dennis' Nose

ocnwo hbk of dx: Butt fuck
NAW Chris: penis nose
ocnwo hbk of dx: My nose is much bigger than my penis
NAW Chris: isn't everything?
 

Conversations

NAW Chris: i should put some more conversations up
NAW Chris: we have some real gems
ocnwo hbk of dx: DO WE
NAW Chris: not really
NAW Chris: but we could script some
 

My Dog "Rowdy"

ocnwo hbk of dx: Has rowdy been neutered?
NAW Chris: yes
ocnwo hbk of dx: Haha
ocnwo hbk of dx: Poor rowdy
ocnwo hbk of dx: They just cut off the balls right
NAW Chris: i don't know
NAW Chris: i didn't take before and after photos
 

Itchy Privates and Where I'm Going In Life

NAW Chris: i really hate when my nuts itch when i'm in the car with someone
NAW Chris: cause you can't scratch, sir. you can't
OCnWo HBK of DX: Sir, you save up your money. Forget about the ranger, take 2 years of criminal justice, go to police academy, and you're a Criminal Investigator sir.
OCnWo HBK of DX: Yeah I hate when you have to do it in class too.
OCnWo HBK of DX: You get to look at dead bodies!!!
NAW Chris: NAKED dead bodies?
OCnWo HBK of DX: Yes!!!!!
NAW Chris: sign me up
 

A Few of Dennis' Traits

OCnWo HBK of DX: I'm going to my homework before I take a shower
NAW Chris: that's wonderful
NAW Chris: you're so responsible and fat
OCnWo HBK of DX: One more than the other
NAW Chris: indeed
 

My Supper

NAW Chris: it took me four minutes to eat those three hotdogs. not record time but i wasn't trying
OCnWo HBK of DX: I had a soy burger, and fries..... I'm not sure what our burgers are, they might not be soy, but they sure as hell aren't beef
OCnWo HBK of DX: I had 2 hotdogs today after school
NAW Chris: wooo
NAW Chris: you go sir
OCnWo HBK of DX: Why the hell do they call them hot dogs anyway?
NAW Chris: now for dessert, a FOURTH hotdog
NAW Chris: just kidding
OCnWo HBK of DX: Ha
 

Stir of Echoes

NAW Chris: oh dear god, Stir of Echos is on TNT
NAW Chris: the scariest movie ever.
OCnWo HBK of DX: Oh I don't get tnt
NAW Chris: have you ever seen it?
OCnWo HBK of DX: What's it about?
NAW Chris: i'm not telling you
NAW Chris: go rent it
NAW Chris: watch it alone at night
OCnWo HBK of DX: No sir
OCnWo HBK of DX: Rent it? Watch it with what?
NAW Chris: then invite a killer over to look into your windows
NAW Chris: a projecting device
OCnWo HBK of DX: SIR WHAT IS IT ABOUT
NAW Chris: you need to rent it because it really takes away from the scariness when you're interrupted by that annoying Dell guy trying to push computers
OCnWo HBK of DX: Annoying dell guy? Now sir we all know we'd kill to be the dell guy because he's a chick magnet.
NAW Chris: i'd rather be a funk magnet
NAW Chris: WHICH I AAAAM
OCnWo HBK of DX: Ha

A "Picture" of Kool Aid

OCnWo HBK of DX: I can drink a whole thing of kool aid a day.
NAW Chris: wow
NAW Chris: wait, an entire packet? what does one packet make, like a cup?
OCnWo HBK of DX: A picture
NAW Chris: you mean a pitcher?
OCnWo HBK of DX: Yes sir
NAW Chris: a pitcher isn't an actual amount of something
OCnWo HBK of DX: Oh you shut up
NAW Chris: it's like saying a butt load
OCnWo HBK of DX: Butt load? Ohhh orgasm.
NAW Chris: tell me about it
...
NAW Chris: dennis
NAW Chris: tell me about it

Dennis' Alter Ego "The Dump Genie"

OCnWo HBK of DX: OCnWo HBK of DX: I am Dennis the Dump Genie. Would you like to see your buttoscope?
Snuffleluffgurl: huh
OCnWo HBK of DX: Whoa, you really have to go huh? Don't worry, I'll wait. You really do need to get that out of there.
OCnWo HBK of DX: Oh..... I'm Dennis, the dump Genie. I know when you have to poop.
Snuffleluffgurl: what the hell
Snuffleluffgurl: uhhhhh
Snuffleluffgurl: no
Snuffleluffgurl: what are oyu talking about?
OCnWo HBK of DX: Your current status is: Clogged.
The last time you took relief was: Three days, two hours, 27 minutes and 9 seconds ago.
You need to take a dump: Immediately.
Your sign is Squat-a-lot, would you like to see your butt-o-scope?
Snuffleluffgurl: no
Snuffleluffgurl: haahaa
Snuffleluffgurl: no
Snuffleluffgurl: i just have cramps
OCnWo HBK of DX: I knew it, you're constipated!
Snuffleluffgurl: no
Snuffleluffgurl: period
Snuffleluffgurl: bad
Snuffleluffgurl: ugh!
OCnWo HBK of DX: Dump Genie Fun Fact #36: Take fiber supplements when constipated, if the problem persists see your local laxative dealer.
OCnWo HBK of DX: There's one disadvantage of being the dump genie, sir, I can tell whenever someone else has to go..... but I can't tell when I have to go.
NAW Chris: haha
NAW Chris: so messy
OCnWo HBK of DX: I'm like a bird sir, I just go whenever my cherry rose opens

Dennis Fabricates a Conversation With Bob

ocnwo hbk of dx: SwedishDemocracy: I can't open my mouth because I'm fat and can't move and people cummed on my mouth and it's frozen. ocnwo hbk of dx: Maybe you should roll over SwedishDemocracy: Why I like it

Fashion Tips

[Dennis rattles off line after line of fashion tips to improve my look then says...]

ocnwo hbk of dx: Sir, this is like queer eye for the straight guy
ocnwo hbk of dx: I can make you sexy
NAW Chris: more like dumb eye for the smart guy
ocnwo hbk of dx: My butt hurts

Quesadilla's

NAW Chris: what's a quesadilla?
ocnwo hbk of dx: case-a-de-uh
ocnwo hbk of dx: It's a taco bell thing
 

My CIS Homework

NAW Chris: want to help me do my CIS homework?
ocnwo hbk of dx: If I can
NAW Chris: all you gotta do is build a computer online
ocnwo hbk of dx: Ha
NAW Chris: you have a budget of $1500
NAW Chris: get as close to it as you can without going over
ocnwo hbk of dx: If you were friends with Nick he could do it
NAW Chris: if i were friends with nick i would've killed myself a long time ago
 

Movies

ocnwo hbk of dx: Which movies did you rent
NAW Chris: anchorman and anacondas
ocnwo hbk of dx: Anacondas is a snake movie right
NAW Chris: good guess
NAW Chris: that's some expert sleuthing
ocnwo hbk of dx: SHUT UP
 

History Class

NAW Chris: guess what
ocnwo hbk of dx: What
NAW Chris: an old guy in my history class asked the teacher to call him "Bananas"
ocnwo hbk of dx: Haha
 

Bob

ocnwo hbk of dx: You made fun of him (Bob) being fat for years and he never got pissed
NAW Chris: but i say he doesn't win at anything and I get the silent treatment for months
ocnwo hbk of dx: I guess he's accepted he's fat but hasn't accepted that he can't win
NAW Chris: yeah
NAW Chris: i bet he went and ate a "comfort cake" after that
ocnwo hbk of dx: Haha
 

Dennis's Penis

ocnwo hbk of dx: My penis used to be shaped weird, like when I'd get a boner it would have a slight curve, because my mom always bought me BRIEFS
NAW Chris: dennis, what made you think i wanted to know that?