Thursday March 17, 2005

Ever since I caught the show Monk on USA a few weeks ago, I've fallen in love with it. It has even cracked the Top 5 in the favorite TV shows category on the About Me page (so long, Stage Moms and Dads, you have to have more than one season if you want to stay on THE LIST). If you don't know, Monk is a show about an obsessive compulsive detective. As I've watched it, I've noticed some of the similarities between he and myself. Unfortunately, they're the things that make him obsessive compulsive. At least in watching it I've realized that those little eccentricities of mine have a name.

After watching the show a few times I decided I would make out a list of all of my eccentric (obsessive compulsive) behaviors... just for fun. Here they are...

1. I don't like for my food to touch different kinds of food on my plate. In an ideal world, I'd eat every meal off of plates that have different sections like the ones in TV dinners. I would never have to worry about my food touching, and it would be very classy to boot.

2. Still on the topic of food, different kinds of food must be eaten section-by-section. Start one, finish it. Then move on. Mixing two kinds of food in my mouth is unspeakable. I cannot partially chew food and then take a drink of something before swallowing, either.

3. If one shoe comes untied, they must both be retied. This is because one shoe cannot be tighter than the other. Same with socks. If one slides down and needs pulled back up, they're both pulled up. Symmetry is important, I guess.

4. When folding paper, the edges must line up perfectly. If they don't, I re-fold it. After it has been refolded, it's imperfect because of the extra crease. It would be OK if that crease were parallel to the new one, but it rarely is. I throw it away or, if it's an important piece of paper, I try not to think about it.

4. Handwriting must be as close to perfect as I can possibly get it at all times. Dennis can attest to this. My sister also often tells me I have nicer handwriting than her. It's not by mistake!

5. Lines must be straight. I'll get out a ruler to underline notes. I'm not kidding.

6. Lines must also be parallel, or if not parallel, perpendicular.

7. I must be absolutely sure about everything. Ask me what 7+3 is and I won't immediately tell you it's 10. I'll count it up in my head first. I have to be sure that 7+3 still equals 10. I should walk around with a calculator at all times.

That's all I can think of at the moment. I'm sure there are more. Quite a few more. When watching the show, I'll see him do something and I'll say to myself, "I DO THAT TOO!" Sure, what he and I have in common is the reason he has to see a therapist and can't live without the aid of a nurse, but at least I know now that the reason I do everything so slowly is not because I'm half retarded or anything like that, it's just that, in my head, everything must be done perfectly. I've also learned that obsessive compulsive behavior isn't just doing one thing 200 times a day, it's doing many "odd" things, like he and I do. Since psychology is an interest of mine, I appreciate it for that too. Often times I've found myself far more interested in his behavior than the case he's working on.

Don't worry, though, everyone. I'm not near as bad as "Monk." I'm fairly certain I won't have to visit a psychiatrist weekly, won't need a nurse, and can take care of myself just fine. But thanks for your concern.